Today I’ve been wandering the internet in search of links for Sparkly. I think she was sort of joking when she asked me to find her advice about queerness, but I’m going to try, at least!
Sparkly has all these conflicted feelings about gender and while I can be sympathetic, I don’t really understand.
I want to try and summarize what she’s told me, for my own benefit.
She doesn’t like how androgynous she looks. She likes being a woman, but she wishes she was curvier so she could look more attractive in a feminine way. On the other hand, she really likes masculine fashion, but she doesn’t feel like she looks masculine enough to look really good in it. She doesn’t want to be a man. She doesn’t want to have to deal with all the negative attitudes people have about manly women.
What I want to find is someplace that’s welcoming and… normalizing? about various gender stuff. Someplace Sparkly can feel more normal and like she has more options.
I cut Sparkly a lot of slack when she’s awkward about other people’s genders because I know she has all these feelings about her own.
I’m not sure how her worrying about my gender fits in, but I’m sure it does somehow.