I was asked to do a favor for someone I don’t like.

And I’m going to do it.  Partly because

  • It will also help someone I do like
  • It won’t take too much effort
  • There isn’t anyone else who could do it (as far as I know.)

But mainly because

  • If she’s rude to me (like she is fairly regularly) while I’m doing her a favor, I’m clearly justified in telling her off.

I’m fairly certain that this is not a good reason to do someone a favor.  No, I’ll be frank: “Now you owe me and you’ll have to be nice to me” is a deeply fucked-up reason to do someone a favor.  It is, in fact, the sort of thing she does regularly. 

But.

I shouldn’t need to blackmail her into basic politeness like not making comments about my sex life.  And the main reason I’m worried about this whole thing is that she acted badly in this very way last time something like this happened.  I’m driving her home from a doctor’s appointment, and I’m told that her last doctor visit was full of “You should act more sympathetic when I’m sick!  Why don’t you treat me more nicely?”  I want to be able to stop her if she starts that again.  This is the first time I’ve been in a position to tell her what to do at all.  But I guess my moral standing isn’t really clear here.

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