An incomplete list of things about my sexuality

An unorganized list with no particular point except that I don’t know whether I should call myself asexual or not.

  • I have very little “sex drive,” “libido,” whatever you want to call it. Spontaneously wanting to have sex with someone is something that happens to me, but I know that because it’s pretty unusual. Maybe once every couple of months?
  •  I can definitely enjoy having sex more often than that, when someone or something turns me on, but I still don’t want to have it all that often. Maybe a couple of times a month.
  • I enjoy sex with Sparkly and I’m glad we have that aspect to our relationship. I like having that kind of intimacy with em.
  • My experience of finding people sexually attractive is also weird. I mostly find people attractive aesthetically without really wanting to do anything with them, and then more rarely want sensual/sexual things.
  • One lovely fascinating thing my brain does (by which I mean confusing and frustrating) is abruptly decide, after having known someone for several months and not thought they were anything special, that I actually do find them attractive. This isn’t an emotional connection thing– it happens even if I don’t really know them any better than I did before. Half a dozen casual conversations at parties over the span of a few months–> oh wow you look a lot like someone I used to have a crush on.
  • I have masturbated since I was little, and I do that occasionally regardless of how much partnered sex I’m having. To me it seems completely different from partnered sex.
  • Sex is sometimes kind of sensory-overload-ing for me, by which I mean that afterwards I want to be alone and quiet for a while, like I do after being in noisy places.

2 thoughts on “An incomplete list of things about my sexuality

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