I just saw a post on Tumblr about self-harm, telling people not to dismiss or downplay self-harm that doesn’t fit the archetype of “cutting because of depression.”
To that end, the post was pushing the idea that anyone who has ever done anything that causes themself physical or psychological pain, with the main purpose of causing themself pain, for any reason, should call themself a self-harmer. With the one exception of religious reasons, idk what they were thinking of with that.
So I went to the OP’s blog, and apparently for them, their self-harm is about expressing how bad they’re feeling and getting reassurance that other people care about how bad they’re feeling. And they obviously have a lot of feelings about that, so I’m not responding or even writing in the tags on tumblr because I don’t want to put my feelings on them when it would probably upset them.
“Don’t dismiss and invalidate people who are upset and asking for help” is a point that stands on its own. It could stand without the assumptions about what self-harm is, and what all people who self-harm must presumably want.
I wish my problem was people agreeing with me that my self-harm isn’t a serious problem.
I’ll call myself a self-harmer when everyone else gets on board with the idea that self-harm doesn’t equal selfhatred-depression-crisis-tragedy.
At first I thought that post was acknowleding the existence of people like me, but the basic assumption was still that self-harm is something people around you should be concerned about, something you need help with, something that indicates you are struggling.
This is why I don’t engage with 99% of everything I’ve ever seen about self-harm. It makes me really uncomfortable but I feel like discussing my perspective would hurt other people.