(gaslighting, emotional abuse)
is not that she’d try to convince me that she’s a totally nice person and any time Sparkly is angry at her it’s because ey misunderstood something.
It’s that when I say in so many words that I know Sparkly did not misunderstand or overreact because I overheard what made em angry, she just changes the subject.
And like. The boat for her to convince me of that sailed a long time ago, because the things I overhear and that Sparkly tells me about are completely consistent with the wildly unacceptable things she’s said both in my presence and to me, directly.
She is that set on insisting that she has never so much as said a harsh word, that she’ll deny things ever happened that I personally witnessed, to my face, as I tell her that I witnessed them.
[A small selection of stuff she did that she knows I saw/heard her do:
— Lied to both me and Sparkly in order to keep Sparkly from coming to a party I held in high school. I tried to streamline the process of her agreeing to let Sparkly come, by talking to her directly before I talked to Sparkly. She told me Sparkly couldn’t come for an obviously bullshit reason, and she told Sparkly the party wasn’t happening.
— Tried to convince me that the world would positively end if Sparkly wasn’t present to help her clean snow off the roof Immediately after it stopped snowing. Then tried to convince me that the world would end if I drove in the snow, despite me pointing out that I would be driving into town in the snow that day whether Sparkly came or not.
— Said some things I won’t repeat, to me on the phone, because she was mad that Sparkly wasn’t back from visiting me yet.
— Cried/lectured at both me and my mother for a good 20-30 minutes about, more or less, how she was jealous that Sparkly and I were friends but she and my mom weren’t and she wanted her fair share.
— I think I still have the text of the email Sparkly sent me when she decided that the only way Sparkly could have so many friends was if ey’d lied to them somehow, and made em apologize to all eir friends for whatever ey’d presumably done. I can’t technically prove that she made em do that, but like. That’s the overarching theme here.
And she still thinks I’m on her side!
I just… I can’t. I don’t know what to do with that. It’s seriously a spooky level of denial.]